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Now that you’ve had a week or two to write up your profile and dip your toe into the world of online dating, it’s time to take a step back and take stock. Even a terse “Fuck off, cave troll” means that at least you’re being heard. It’s one of those times that makes you feel like you’re ready to scrap the whole idea and try your hand in places where you might have more success…

Or are you sending a lot of messages out into the void, never to be heard from again? Much like in real life, the only reaction that really infuriates is reaction.

After all, most people’s profiles don’t exactly give you a ton of material to work with, do they? Ask yourself if what you’re writing sounds completely original.

So how do you cobble together something from a pile of nothing? If not, the person you’re contacting probably has 10 emails just like yours sitting on the computer screen. Even though you’re writing to someone out of the blue, do so with the belief that this person would be lucky to have you. Your profile ultimately does the selling; your email just has to pique their interest.

Remember, that’s why she wrote it – because she wants you to get to know her, not because she wants to be told for the umpteenth time that she’s hot. NOT the thing you like the most, NOT the thing you find most attractive, NOT the thing you have in common. It might be how she doesn’t know how to program her Ti Vo. Yes, you think it’s cool that she also likes Robert De Niro movies and skiing in Vail. The sillier and more over-the-top your email, the funnier it’ll be.

It is also worth noting that most often discuss this from the point of view of a man contacting a woman, since that was my experience, but my hope is that the thoughts here are helpful to anyone.have you considered that maybe, just maybe, you’re going about it all wrong?Much like dating in the real world, online dating presents an almost infinite number of ways to shoot yourself in the foot and kill your chances before you even get started.Here’s a new article which I wrote as a special to Yahoo! And while I never write emails for others, the request makes perfect sense. ———————————————————— Of all the things that clients (especially men) ask me to help them with, the most common query involves assistance with writing introductory emails.